First of all, congratulations on your pregnancy! What an exciting and truly amazing time.
If you’re scared of giving birth despite the fact that you can’t wait to meet your baby (or babies ;)), this video is for you.
I share with you my top 7 tips on how to overcome the fear of childbirth and maybe even get excited about it…
Prefer to read? Have a look below.
Would you like to have a fearless birth?
A birth you can look forward to?
And would you like to know exactly how you can prepare for it?
I want to share with you 7 steps that will help you have an empowered and calm birth experience.
Unfortunately a lot of women believe, and I definitely used to be one of them, that giving birth is one of the worst experiences in a woman’s life and some women even choose not to have children because they are so scared of it.
However, there are a lot of things we can do to overcome this fear and here they are:
1. Trust your body!
Women all over the world have given birth for thousands of years and in fact our amazing bodies are designed to give birth, right? Looking at it from an evolutionary standpoint, this is really all we’re here for.
And no! This is not to say that I’m against any woman’s choice not to have children.
Seeing other mammals give birth, they usually do this all by themselves and most of the time at night when it’s dark and quiet and they are undisturbed.
We have a lot of sheep here in the UK and it fascinated me to see these teeny tiny little baby sheep that have just been born early in the morning and the mum and the lamb are just by themselves.
Now, that certainly doesn’t mean that in some cases we don’t need a bit of help, but what I do want you to take away from this is that your body knows what it’s doing. And even more so if you’re treating yourself well during your pregnancy!
So trust your body!
2. Choose your birthing team wisely.
Ideally you want to have a team including your birth partner, and that can be your intimate partner or a good friend, your mum or your sister;
a doula who will help both you and your birth partner with all sorts of things during labour and birth;
a midwife (and depending on where you live this might be free of charge or you can work with a private midwife);
and then depending on your personal preferences and financial situation, you might even consider working with a photographer who can capture your memories.
Of course you only want to work with people you trust.
3. Keep positive!
If you’re scared of giving birth, which is probably why you’re here, I’m sure you’ve been inundated with horror stories, be it by your mum, friends and other family members, movies, tv shows, pictures and so on…
Keep all of those stories out of your life from now on and if someone (and there always seems to be someone while you’re pregnant) wants to tell your about their negative experience, ask them to wait until after your birth.
You can say something along the lines of: “Hey, I’d love to hear your birth story, but I’d really prefer to talk about it after I’ve given birth.”
If for any reason you can’t make such a request, for example if you’re visiting a hospital antenatal class, there is a technique that I teach in The Wise Hippo Birthing Programme called “The Cloak of Protection”, that will help you protect yourself from any negativity coming your way.
And as a bonus you can use this technique for all sorts of situations in life, not just during your pregnancy.
Now, THIS is super important and something that I go into in a lot more detail as to how to actually do this, in my classes, but to give you the quick version:
You want to relax your mind completely, because a relaxed mind means your whole body and especially your pelvic muscles will be relaxed as well, which is exactly what we want to help your baby make its way out more easily and stress free.
And ONE amazing way to do this is by imagining yourself being outside in nature, at the beach, in a forest, up on a mountain or even in your own garden, whatever calms your mind and your body.
And I actually have a beautiful gift for you that you can download here.
It’s an mp3 called Calm & Relaxed and it’s taken directly from The Wise Hippo Birthing programme.
You can listen to it as often as you like before your birth and of course postpartum if you choose to.
If you’re relaxed, you will naturally breathe deeper into your belly, which is so important for labour and birth.
I teach the couples in my classes a few different breathing techniques and the two you want to be using while you’re in labour, are called:
5, 4, 3, 2, 1 relax, which is a breathing technique that relaxes your whole body from head to toes, and this one you will use in between your surges;
and The Waves of Relaxation, a breathing technique you can use during your surges, when you want to relax the most.
6. Breathe or hum your baby down.
That’s something you want to be doing at the end instead of pushing. Most of us believe that we have to push the baby out and most women actually feel a natural urge to push at the very end.
However, if you’re pushing with force, you’re causing the sphincters of your vagina to close right in front of your baby’s head which can slow down the process a lot.
So hum your baby down and that can, in a lot of cases, even prevent you from tearing.
7. Connect with your baby.
You want to be doing this throughout your pregnancy and especially during labour and birth.
And what I mean by that is to check in with your body and your baby throughout the day, get quiet and relax and just feel how your belly feels.
Can you feel your baby moving? Even if it’s just tiny movements?
So often we only really feel them once we go to bed after a hectic day, when we lay down and finally calm down.
Communicate, bond with your baby as much as you can. And then of course during labour realise that the surges that you feel are your baby getting closer to you, closer and closer with every single surge.
And this is also my favourite affirmation of them all 😉 that I myself used a LOT during the birth of my son and that is:
“Every surge brings my baby closer to me.”
There is of course a whole bunch of affirmations like this one that you can use during your pregnancy, during birth and even postpartum.
Ok, so there you have it, 7 steps to a fearless birth.
If you’d like to add any steps that you are using and that work for you, please add them in the comments below.
And remember to download your FREE Calm & Relaxed mp3 from The Wise Hippo Birthing Programme.
I hope this was helpful! I’m thinking of you and sending you lots of love gorgeous Mama! ❤︎